It’s now been nine years since my dad passed away. June 2 of 2015 started out like any other day, but it certainly ended on a different note, to say the absolute least.
Most details are long gone to my memory, but I sure remember where I was, how I got the bad news, and above all, how I felt.
In a way, I’m glad I wasn’t there to see it happen, but I’m sad about my mom making the awful discovery and I regret my last words to Dad being rushed, since my younger siblings and I were running late for Young Single Adult Institute. Dad always said he wanted to go quickly, in one fell swoop, so in a bizarre way, his wish came true.
The song “Dance With My Father” from Luther Vandross strikes an especial nerve with me, particularly this lyric, “Never dreamed that he/Would be gone from me.”
Not once have I wondered where he is now or whether I’ll ever see him again. I’ve had no further cause to question the reality of heaven and forever families than I’ve had to question the sun in the sky. The only questions I’ve been compelled to ask are why he had to go so soon and how would the rest of the family get along without him.
Fortunately, our family has managed to do just fine. We’ve had our moments, but we’re okay and I think it’s safe to say we’re all moving in the right direction.
But of course, we all miss Dad very much and it’s sad that his grandchildren will grow up without really knowing their Pop-Pop. Mom probably misses him most of all, her husband and best friend.
These days, we make an effort to make this day a celebration of Dad’s life, getting balloons for his grave, watching the slideshow that they played at his funeral, and eating ice cream.
It’s times like these when the gospel of Jesus Christ not only helps you keep moving forward but also saves you from snapping with grief and frustration. My heart goes out to those who assume that death is indeed the end, who have also lost their dads or don’t have such a great relationship with them. My own dad was far from perfect, but he was human like everyone else, he always did his best, and he’s definitely one of the good ones.
I look forward to the dedication of the Layton Temple, two weeks from now. The temple has been one of the few places, if not the place, that I could go to really feel better. And I know for a fact Dad won’t miss that occasion for anything.
I love you, Dad.
