That's the thing about Beowulf: people can't fully make up their minds what to think of him. He's no more a saint than he is a monster, and anyone who accuses him to his face of being "evil," they have no answer when he challenges them, "You try living the way I do and see how long you last."
Most people in Beowulf's situation would be a total wreck within just a few months, if not a few days, or even hours.
Beowulf is the first to admit when he's guilty, but then again, it's plain enough how much worse he can be and yet he chooses of his own accord to not go there. That requires no small amount of self-control.
He can't decide whether it's worse to be hunted down or left entirely alone. He's well accustomed to being alone...but he still doesn't like it.
For all his marvelous and terrifying adventures, he goes for many years without a family or a place to call "home." He's like a leaf blowing in the wind, or a drifting ship without an anchor or any trace of shore in sight.
The anime Ringing Bell makes me think of him. For those of you who don't know, it's about a young lamb who loses his mother and learns to be more like a wolf...with the very wolf who killed his mother as his tutor. Quite complicated, to say the least.
I won't spoil the ending, but there's an utterly heart-wrenching line that fits Beowulf perfectly, especially when he's first transformed and his whole family is killed off: "But I'm still alive! Where do I go now?"
Be forewarned if you watch the anime: it's as depressing as all heck.
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At least Beowulf's story is a bit more uplifting than that, given how he meets Terence and becomes his most devoted ally, and how Reid wins him over many years later. If not for Terence, Beowulf would have become a complete villain, sooner or later. He would have been okay if he hadn't met Reid, but Reid sure made those last days all the warmer, far more pleasant and far less lonely.
Loving the Lactantiuses (and receiving their love in exchange) was truly his saving grace.
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